\u00a9 2023 wikiHow, Inc. All rights reserved. A condescending person might say something like, "Well, I would agree with you, but then we'd both be wrong." 2 They may be trying to prove how smart they are. As a small thank you, wed like to offer you a $30 gift card (valid at GoNift.com). Then, when they make that error, theyre suddenly a perfect target for mockery and condescension. They are the comments that are laced with attitude and hidden meaning, typically at the expense of another individual. Well, many of those people have chosen an area or subject to immerse themselves in and use this expertise as a mark of superiority. Here are some examples of condescending statements: "Well, I know YOU think that, but in reality" "Wait, so you REALLY thought that [insert think you actually did think here]" Some people you'll click with instantly, while others might rub you the wrong way. There are all kinds of people who are unpleasant to be around-Debbie downers, complainers, jealous green monsters, mean-spirited snarks, and most anyone who wears neon sunglasses- but if you walk away from another person feeling worse about yourself, there's a good chance you've been dealing with a condescending person. We provide both training and coaching on the subjects of condescending and demeaning behavior. They embody elitism and behave as though having money and certain life experiences makes them a superior human being. You can't help but feel like they're belittling your perspective as short-sighted and childish. References. Originally published Thanks to all authors for creating a page that has been read 32,305 times. Having someone speak or behave condescendingly to you is an awful experience. Its a type of behaviour that cuts across generations. 6. Examples of Condescending Behavior at Work Condescending people make us feel bad about ourselves with their tone of voice and patronizing attitude. ManageBetter, with its library of 3,000 feedback phrases, might be a resource you want to check out. Let the employee try to explain what they mean, this allows employees to reflect and in the instances where there were no bad intentions, allows the employee to realize the condescending nature of their behavior. Taking yourself out of the situation allows you as the manager to evaluate the employees' intentions: Mental distance provides you with the clarity to respond appropriately and effectively to every situation. We all have the right to feel valued and respected at work. Stay calm and centered during the conversation even if your employee . Yes, you can definitely be arrogant and insecure at the same time. Examples of condescending behavior include acting as if you know everything and are not open to new ideas, reacting to an upset with "well, that's never happened to me", offering unsolicited advice (unless you are a supervisor), not being open to feedback, referring to people in the group in the third person (even if they are sitting right worthy of admiration, the default assumption is that they must have had help with it. 1 To provide inspiration, weve include four different scenarios, with sample dialogue, to help you prepare for difficult conversations with your employees. I enjoyed it. They might not even be aware they were doing it. Allow All Cookies. Sometimes, they also tend to make unnecessary noise so they can cover up their ignorance. Both coworkers prefer the long forms of their names and introduce themselves as such. Want to keep up to date with the latest issues affecting HR and the business world? The Florida student-athlete who killed herself in November 2021 after receiving volleys of abuse from her track coach told police about his behavior a month before her death. Others may have heard it from those who have opposing political views or from people who make different personal life choices, such as dietary preferences or breastfeeding. 1.) Feb 12, 2020. Try to see the value in the over-corrector employee, perhaps their goal is to better the company, providing them with feedback that demonstrates you appreciate their desire to constantly do better, but prefer it to be done differently. (The Truth), Empaths In Relationships: 15 Tips For Happy And Healthy Love, Copyright A Conscious Rethink. wikiHow, Inc. is the copyright holder of this image under U.S. and international copyright laws. However, people are sometimes condescending in more subtle ways, such as talking about people behind their backs or making fun of colleagues in the form of jokes. Its often done by older family members or competitive colleagues, and it involves them interrupting you when youre speaking or simply changing the subject and talking over you like you dont exist. Related: 25 Words That Make Other People Feel Inferior. She is now living on welfare, which is where she deserves to be. Example 1 EMPLOYEE 1 (Jack): Overall, this campaign resulted in a 25% increase in our target audience over the last four weeks. Whatever you do, don't storm off or get angry. 3) Giving unsolicited advice So when people feel like someone is talking down to them, it usually has as much to do with what they say as how they say it. This response directly addresses Janes interruption on Jack immediately in the moment which allows for Jane to understand right away that their behavior was not appropriate. Ignoring the perpetrator is often the best approach. Related: 15 Things Men Say That Get on Women's Nerves. Still, at least now you know what to look out for. Most condescending behaviors can be handled with direct professional communication. Furthermore, if you go to your boss and let them know whats going on, youll end up looking like a petty juvenile who cant handle situations on your own. Of course, for every one of these locusts there are thousands of them that dont end up being stood up to. For example, were you to tell someone, "You're always late," or, "You never clean the toilet," they're likely to feel as if you're making a definitive statement about who they are and will almost certainly rack their brains for contradictory evidence. But it's also important to keep in mind that studies suggest that 75 to 90 percent of communication is nonverbal. Many of us have received a critical email from a condescending boss that lists all the things you did wrong, and then ends with, "but I actually thought this thought was great." Watch your body language when confronting someone: finger pointing, crossing your arms, rolling your eyes or standing over the person while they are seated wont do you any favours in resolving the situation. The thing about condescension is, it can be overcome. Be humble. He seemed fine at first. They might not even be aware they were doing it. Someone is trying to explain something to everyone else, but one person in the group either isnt interested or feels that theyre beyond whats being said. Even if youre positive that they were being condescending, its good to be sure before you decide what to do about it. Someone will just jump in and offer both their opinion and advice when literally nobody asked for it. Going to HR may seem extreme, but if youve tried everything else, it may be your only option. This expands upon the previous example, because it usually involves interrupting someone mid-sentence. It doesn't come cloaked in kindness. While it may sound obvious, remembering that the condescending behavior is not personal to you as the manager is very important. Did you not hear me? In essence, theyre behaving as though your choices and preferences are childish, uneducated, misguided, and even embarrassing. Not only is it demeaning, its frustrating and even dehumanizing. When coaching those accused of this behavior, we find that they frequently do not understand what we mean by those terms. Instead, focus on staying as calm as you can. You don't have to give a compliment to give a critique. Enjoy! Impulsiveness Of Youth In Romeo And Juliet. The constant interjection is simply not necessary and comes across as narcissistic. This article has been viewed 32,305 times. Subscribe to our daily or weekly email for news and analysis that will get you thinking in the morning. Passionate about making Qigong more accessible to people, Frank is the author of "Qigong: The Quick & Easy Start-Up Guide." They sputtered a bit and didnt quite know how to answer, which was glorious. A woman boss might think she's being approachable or motherly by calling her female employees "honey" or "sweetie," but that can lead to a sense of false familiarity that makes it difficult for employees to speak frankly. This might seem like a no-brainer, but it happens more often than you'd think. Examples of Condescending Remarks You might notice condescending speech and behavior in someone like this. I understand that the data I am submitting will be used to provide me with the above-described products and/or services and communications in connection therewith. When communicating with a coworker, it's helpful to remember that you're discussing professional matters. Confronting condescending employees will not be pleasant. This image may not be used by other entities without the express written consent of wikiHow, Inc.
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